We each have a unique honest self. A state of being where we feel at rest in our own skin. The problem is that we are all trying to find where that place actually is.
Finding that dwelling place is hard because it’s not a single place. It’s a moment in time combined with a state of being. You can be content in your skin one day as you look at your work and your family then with no major change in your circumstances you wake up and realize that the skin you inhabit is no longer your own.
You’re back on the journey after a fleeting glimpse of that day of comfort and rest.
We’re all copycats. We see a process working for someone else. We see their name floating around in the circles we follow. We try that success strategy on like a pair of pants that looked great on our friend.
As we try on the process we suck in and flail and squeeze finally winded we are inside the ‘path’ to success. When others see us wearing these proverbial pants they heartily agree that we look good in our pants while also having a deep-seated revulsion as something inside recoils at our lack of authentic self.
We look good but don’t feel good down inside and that deep down feeling of oil resting on clean water comes through. It may take a while but the taint comes through and we step back out of those pants that look good but simply don’t fit and head away again in search of our skin.
The thing is that even inside that ‘scheme’ which worked for so many there is something to learn and apply in our own quest for happiness.
The last coach I employed has had great success with his formula. Others have had great success with his formula. In theory I could have great success by following the path laid out but it just doesn’t feel authentically me.
Yes travelling all over to speak can net you money but I have money and all that travelling will replace experiences with my family. Stepping back from that mirror in which I see myself as a successful travelling speaker I realize that I look like the emperor with no clothes on. I don’t value that prestige or the money that would come from it.
I do value the experience with my family.
So as with the rest of you I embark again on the next leg in my quest to find that comfort in my own skin. I don’t forget the things I’ve learned by trying a new path, I just change how I use them till they feel right.
I strive to find that single moment in time, that one day where I am comfortable in my own skin. While it’s fleeting those days are the ones we cherish that keep us searching for the next day.