My friend Eric recently wrote about his quest to get the right fit in his life. It seems to me that he is trying to sort out the things that are most important to him and then set about doing them, and in theory, getting someone to pay him for it. Darryl at Loving the Bike just wrote about the same thing, his two loves and setting him self up to work in a way that gives him as much time as possible to do the things he loves.

To many who view my life from the outside it would seem like I have things sorted. I spend every Saturday with my daughter, have time to pick her up from daycare and play with her every day. I can even take the odd weekday off to hang with her and my wife. I take Friday’s for personal work and then go for a ride with my afternoon. But it stills feels like I’m falling short, at least from this side.

Much like Eric, programming is a job. Sure I get to work on some cool stuff and I certainly don’t hate it, but I also often feel that I’m not working on the projects that really interest me. I don’t have bad clients or anything, just not the work I’m really passionate about. Secondly, I despite the time I get to take off I feel like I spend too much time worrying about work. Lot’s of my weekday time off with the family has a bit of stress for me as I think of the work things I could be doing, or let my mind wander to the balance of my bank account (whose perfect balance is n+1).

I’ve always thought that you should live your life as if your funeral is coming up and what do you want someone to say about you? I don’t care if they say I was a good programmer, or that I was a great business man. I want people to say that I was a good husband and father, that’s it. Paying myself with riding certainly helps me recharge and thus helps me accomplish the items above, but if it got in the way I’d give it up to be a good dad.

Are you living your life as if someone is writing your eulogoy now? If not you’re wasting time.